Folk tales

[libertango]

You know how we're frequently told that once upon a time, America was a more civil place, and just plain folks were polite with each other on a much more consistent basis?

I've been mulling over some of my experiences lately, and I've decided I'm not sure a word of it is true.

Why? Well, it's because of my job. I spend every day talking to about 45 people, plus or minus a few. And I'd already noticed that my clientele skews elderly, Southern, or both.

But quite recently I noticed that the folks with whom I have a conversation with the usual ebb and flow -- we each listen to the other, and then we speak in turn, even if we disagree -- are mostly the ones with younger voices. And the ones who are most likely to break in, interrupt, and never let me get a word in edgewise -- not even to help, fer chrissakes -- tend to be folks with older voices.

They don't even tend to be New Yorkers. :)

(Although New Yorkers are noticeably brusque in other ways that stand out.)

And it was as I was thinking to myself during one of these harangues by a senior, "Where were you raised, a barnyard? Don't you have any manners?" that I said to myself, "Self... I don't think they do. Or ever did."

Now, maybe it's just because those with older sounding voices aren't actually older (though many tell me their age -- another trait of seniors). Or maybe it's because they've been such well behaved boys and girls for so long they figure they've earned their right to stomp all over others conversationally.

But, strangely, my working hypothesis is that they're just behaving as they always have, and the myth of lost civility is just that -- a myth.

Which means the novels of James Ellroy are probably more mimetic than you know. :)

Comments

[marykaykare.livejournal.com]

I had a somewhat different experience when I was talking to lots of folks on the phone, but, and I think this is important, I was answering phones to take orders from people with our catalogs rather than doing help desk stuff. The older and southern voices, and the people placing the biggest orders, were the nicest. The young voices calling from the northeast (and ordering from the Pottery Barn catalog - we had 5 catalogs we answered for) were the rudest. I think some of those older folks you're dealing with may be anxious about having problems with that new fangled computer stuff which they don't really understand anyway, and that can lead them to be abrupt or overly talkative; whereas the younger folks are not made anxious by having problems with the technology. Or at least not in the same way the seniors are.

Or maybe not. Just my theory.

MKK